Showing posts with label sad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sad. Show all posts
Thursday, February 7, 2008
The saddest summer and I boy was I confused
He moved back home and I didn't know what to think or do with out him. I was so confused as what his intentions were. I use to drive by his house when ever my friends and I were going some where just in hopes of seeing him for a few seconds. He was a rebel and still came around not as much as I wanted but he was around. He would just show up or call out of the blue. I was thrilled when ever he showed up. It made me so happy to get to be near him for a few minutes. He brought me flowers once that summer and it was so wonderful to know that he was thinking of me. I loved seeing the flowers in my room. Then my birthday rolled around and he showed up with a licorice rope and suction cup dart gun. I had no idea what he was thinking but I was thrilled that he was thinking of me and thought to make an effort for my birthday. I know this summer we went skating a lot so I could see him, I sure was lucky to have such wonderful friends that went along with my obsessive behavior. Several times he showed up and we were able to go out to the movies, putt putt, or just to get something to eat. I remember sitting at the drive in movie with him and talking. It was so nice to just be with him again. He would be around and then gone again for awhile then back for awhile. I was completely lost with out him my heart ached from what I had and lost. I am sure he was trying to figure out his life and what he wanted but man was I confused. I sure was glad when that summer ended.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
What a wonderful couple of months but then
I was finally his girlfriend, HE WAS MY BOYFRIEND, I couldn't believe it. It took over 2 years but it finally happened. I had never been so happy. He had his own apartment and we would hang out at his apartment. One night he took some fireworks and opened them up and arranged them in to heart and called me out to the balcony and lit them. It was the sweetest thing anyone had done for me.
Shortly after we started dating he decided he wanted to go to Massachusetts to visit his family and friends. I told my mom he was going and she told me to go with him. It was an awesome trip. I got to meet most of his relatives and we had fun with his friends. We went to the aquarium in Boston. Slept in a tent in his friend's yard. We talked a lot and dreamed alot. He had CB radio and we would talk to the truckers. One of them used the handle Too Tall and told us that we had to name our first kid after him. It was an amazing time with him. However if you ask him I slept the entire trip and didn't even wake up when he stopped to get something to eat and take a potty break. I am sure he is exaggrating though, I couldn't have slept that much. :0)
Just after the trip I was sitting in 4th period waiting for class to start when Jason's sister came running in the room got right in front of me and said I heard you were dating my brother. I said I was. She said why didn't you tell me and I said something like I didn't want to upset her. She was my friend but he was my heart. I wonder what she thought, I wonder if she was mad at me or him. I pretty sure she knew I liked her brother from early on in our friendship.
He worked for skating rink and we would hang out there and skate or I would just watch him skate. He was a great skater and every one loved him. I was so proud of him and loved knowing that we were together. He really was my dream come true walking or skating around.
My friends and I would come down to his apartment and hang out. He loved to watch Star Trek and I use to tease him that I thought his tv was broken because every time I was there it was playing Star Trek. I remember eating captain crunch cereal and my friends had eaten all the berries from the crunch berry cereal. A couple of them playing Chubby bunny with marshmallows (seeing how many marshmallows you could fit in your mouth and still say chubby bunny) I first told him I loved him in his apartment, even though he just stared at me when I told him I did love him and I just hoped that one day he would feel the same way. We shared so much at his apartment . One of the funniest memories I have of his apartment was right before one of the saddest parts of our relationship. He had to move out of his apartment because he couldn't afford it anymore and would be moving back home. It would be nice to have him closer but I knew he was sad to be giving up his freedom. Little did I know how much it would cost me too. Before he moved out we were hanging out in his apartment and he had cool whip in the fridge. Somehow we wound up having a coolwhip fight. It was so much fun, we laughed so hard and had a great time.
Then the bad news, he was moving home and his parents didn't approve of our relationship so he would have to break up with me in order to move back home. His parents loved his ex-girlfriend and I wasn't her and never could or would be. I wasn't good enough for their boy because of who I had dated before. There was nothing I could do to change things. I was losing my heart and I was was powerless to change it.
How could this be? How could I get everything I had hoped for only to have it taken away over something I couldn't control. I was heartbroken, lost and confused.
Shortly after we started dating he decided he wanted to go to Massachusetts to visit his family and friends. I told my mom he was going and she told me to go with him. It was an awesome trip. I got to meet most of his relatives and we had fun with his friends. We went to the aquarium in Boston. Slept in a tent in his friend's yard. We talked a lot and dreamed alot. He had CB radio and we would talk to the truckers. One of them used the handle Too Tall and told us that we had to name our first kid after him. It was an amazing time with him. However if you ask him I slept the entire trip and didn't even wake up when he stopped to get something to eat and take a potty break. I am sure he is exaggrating though, I couldn't have slept that much. :0)
Just after the trip I was sitting in 4th period waiting for class to start when Jason's sister came running in the room got right in front of me and said I heard you were dating my brother. I said I was. She said why didn't you tell me and I said something like I didn't want to upset her. She was my friend but he was my heart. I wonder what she thought, I wonder if she was mad at me or him. I pretty sure she knew I liked her brother from early on in our friendship.
He worked for skating rink and we would hang out there and skate or I would just watch him skate. He was a great skater and every one loved him. I was so proud of him and loved knowing that we were together. He really was my dream come true walking or skating around.
My friends and I would come down to his apartment and hang out. He loved to watch Star Trek and I use to tease him that I thought his tv was broken because every time I was there it was playing Star Trek. I remember eating captain crunch cereal and my friends had eaten all the berries from the crunch berry cereal. A couple of them playing Chubby bunny with marshmallows (seeing how many marshmallows you could fit in your mouth and still say chubby bunny) I first told him I loved him in his apartment, even though he just stared at me when I told him I did love him and I just hoped that one day he would feel the same way. We shared so much at his apartment . One of the funniest memories I have of his apartment was right before one of the saddest parts of our relationship. He had to move out of his apartment because he couldn't afford it anymore and would be moving back home. It would be nice to have him closer but I knew he was sad to be giving up his freedom. Little did I know how much it would cost me too. Before he moved out we were hanging out in his apartment and he had cool whip in the fridge. Somehow we wound up having a coolwhip fight. It was so much fun, we laughed so hard and had a great time.
Then the bad news, he was moving home and his parents didn't approve of our relationship so he would have to break up with me in order to move back home. His parents loved his ex-girlfriend and I wasn't her and never could or would be. I wasn't good enough for their boy because of who I had dated before. There was nothing I could do to change things. I was losing my heart and I was was powerless to change it.
How could this be? How could I get everything I had hoped for only to have it taken away over something I couldn't control. I was heartbroken, lost and confused.
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